Zombie Apocalypse

Check out how everything goes to hell in a Zombie Apocalypse.

Makes for a very entertaining read. Thanks to Style and Relax for the link!

ZOMBIFIED: Jane Chua

We just finished zombifying Jane Chua.

We tackled this project a bit differently than Jayvee’s zombification. For one we kept Jane’s smile intact as I felt that it made her look more evil compared to if she was just scowling. We kept the damage and carnage to a minimum (although she is missing her left arm) but we did add shards of glass in her head for effect.

All in all the Jane Chua zombie has a creepy effect which I mostly attribute to her smile.

Zombification is courtesy of Robo Monkey Pixel Fighter’s Neil Amiel Cervantes. I provided the linework and guidelines for zombification.

As usual I’ll make some wallpaper later for your desktops and mobile phones so that zombie Jane can keep you company at night.

Meanwhile, if you also want to be Zombified, send me a picture and we'll turn you into one of the walking undead. E-mail them to admin (AT) jonasdiego.com.

At this point I would like to thank you all for the warm welcome and for some patience if you happen to be one of the people who sent in their pictures for zombification. There’s a bit of a waiting list now but rest assured we will get to you in time.

It’s inevitable.

Chainsaws

A chainsaw is something that any aspiring zombie slayer would want to have handy in a tight spot.

A chainsaw is defined as a motorized saw used to remove branches and foliage and cut trees. It is often used by loggers and tree surgeons. Emergency response teams also use them in wild land fire suppression activities. Over the years, some artists have adopted the chainsaw to create art...but that’s not why we’re here, eh?

A chainsaw is composed of an engine, a drive mechanism, a guide bar, and a cutting chain (otherwise known as the business end of a chainsaw).

Wikipedia say that the “origin is debated, but the first chainsaw was probably made around 1830 by the German orthopaedist Bernard Heine”. He called it the osteotome and had links of a chain carrying small cutting teeth. Instead of lumber however, this instrument was used to cut bone.

Sounds good to me.

Ease of Handling. Chainsaws are not the easiest of weapons to handle. They’re big and heavy and require a lot of strength to swing around. Even the smaller portable ones are cumbersome at best. Given this particular limitation this weapon might not be for everyone.

Maintenance. The chainsaw requires a lot of maintenance and a good deal of knowledge about engines since a chainsaw without an engine is about as useful as a gun without bullets. Considerations like constant lubrication (most chainsaws run on two types), keeping the chains sharp, and cleaning and removing zombie guts from it are some of the things that you have to consistently watch out for lest your mean machine jams at the most inopportune time.

Chainsaw in general are designed to cut through wood. Use it on materials like stone or steel and it will blunt easily. Cutting through waves of zombies will be easy enough at first but the more blood and guts that get into the thing the more it will muck it up, necessitating that you take five to clean and lubricate (which may not be possible sometime).

Availability. I think I’ve seen one or two in a hardware shop somewhere but I don’t think there are a lot of shops that carry them probably because of a lack of demand...until the zombies show up, that is.

Damage. Total. This machine was designed to cut through lumber. With the kind of damage it can dish out on a piece of lumber it’s sure to make mince meat out of a few undead bodies.

While it isn’t the handiest of weapons it’s still advisable to have one around if you can get one. This is a weapon of last resort because it is essentially a close quarter combat weapon (you want to put as much distance between you and zombies as much as possible because it’s so easy to get overwhelmed or get infected at close quarters) that is hard to maneuver and, if you’re not careful, you just might end up cutting someone’s limb.

Worse, it could be yours.

Zombified Jayvee Desktop and Mobile Wallpapers

Check out these cool zombified Jayvee Fernandez wallpapers for your desktops and cellphones! Just click on one to get the full size, right click on the image, and select "save link as" and you're good to go.

DESKTOP WALLPAPERS


1280X800


1280X1024


1152X864


1024X768


800X600

MOBILE PHONE WALLPAPERS


240X320


176X208


128X160


128X128

If you also want to be zombified e-mail us your picture at admin (AT) jonasdiego.com!

Tobie Abad is our next candidate for ZOMBIFICATION

And we have another candidate for zombification, hot on Jane Chua's heels. This time it's Tobie Abad of The Garapata Speaks.

Tobie is a long time fan of the horror genre and has written muh prose and comics about it.

Tobie blogs over at The Garapata Speaks and has recently joined Nanowrimo 2009 and, as anyone who has ever attempted to write a full length novel in the course of just a month (which is what Nanowrimo is all about), is quite busy.

We'll be doing the danse macabre on Tobie's face as soon as we're done with Jane Chua.

Watch out for that.

If you also want to be zombified e-mail us your picture at admin (AT) jonasdiego.com!

Jane Chua is our next candidate for ZOMBIFICATION

And we have our second candidate for zombification and, let me tell you folks, I almost said no.

Because really, how can you zombify such a pretty face like Jane Chua's?

But Jane has already submitted her picture for the zombification process and thus I must honor her request.

Jane blogs at Between Bites which is the anthology or bite-size stories of her appetite for getting the best out of life. So, if you want to get a bite of food, culture, music, movie, sports, poker, reading, fashion, lifestyle, and events happening in and out of the Metro check out Between Bites.

We'll be doing a number on her face and body as soon as we're done making Jayvee Fernandez's zombie desktop and mobile wallpapers.

Watch out for that.

If you also want to be zombified e-mail us your picture at admin (AT) jonasdiego.com!

ZOMBIFIED: Jayvee Fernandez

Zombie Philippines is proud to present our first zombification project featuring Jayvee Fernandez.

Since Jayvee was our first we decided to really go all out on his zombification. No partial decay here, ladies and gentlemen. This is an undead in the last stages of decomposition (or advanced stages of zombification, depending on how you want to look at it).

Zombification courtesy of Robo Monkey Pixel Fighter’s Neil Amiel Cervantes with some linework assist from yours truly.

I’ll make some wallpapers later for your desktops and mobile phones.

Meanwhile, if you also want to be zombified, send me a picture and we'll turn you into one of the walking undead. E-mail them to admin (AT) jonasdiego.com.

Zombification in Progress

Jayvee Fernandez is currently in the process of zombification.

You guys should see the results in a day or two. I'm trying to convince my buddy Simoun Ung to also undertake the process but outright refuses. If you're brave (or at least curious) enough to see what you would like as a zombie, e-mail us one of your pictures (preferably a medium-range to close-up shot to better capture the details) and we'll give it a go.

Send them to admin (AT) jonasdiego.com.

What are the best Weapons against Zombies?

If there’s one thing that you cannot have enough of when dealing with zombies, it’s weapons.

Sure, if it comes down to it, go hand to hand by all means but when you’re faced with a horde of undead in a dimly lit back alley somewhere in a post apocalyptic world there’s nothing like some cold hard steel in your hand to make sure that you get home safe and sound and preferably uninfected.

Weapons can be classified into four different categories:

1. Blunt weapons
2. Bladed weapons
3. Guns
4. Explosives and Incendiary Devices

There are 4 things you need to consider when choosing a weapon: ease of handling, maintenance considerations, accuracy, and the damage it can dish out.

Today, we’re going to be discussing the pros and cons for all of them.


BLUNT WEAPONS

These are your typical baseball bat, crow bar, or just plain piece of lumber with a rusty nail on one end. They’re nothing special, really.

Ease of Handling. The drawback is that it’s much harder to use than real weapons (with possibly the exception of the baseball bat) because these were not designed to be used as aggressive implements. They’re everyday tools designed to perform specific tasks. On the other hand there’s no special training required so pretty much anyone can just pick one up and swing away.

Maintenance. Depending on their design, construction, and material used in making them, blunt weapons often do not last very long, such as in the case of the baseball bat and the piece of lumber with the nail. You’ll need to replace them on a regular basis unless you want your bat to suddenly break in the middle of a zombie attack with about 12 more undead to go.

Availability. The beauty of these kinds of weapons is their widespread availability (chances are you’re probably going to come across a blunt weapon just by walking in the street) and their ease of use (no special training required...just swing them in the direction of a zombie’s noggin and you’re good to go).

Damage. Blunt weapons tend to do less damage unless you happen to be very strong in which case it still takes a lot of energy to use them properly with satisfactory results.

But hey, when it comes to a pinch, I’m sure that a blunt weapon will still be very much welcome.


BLADED WEAPONS

This is where it starts getting better. I’ll take bladed weapons over blunt weapons any day of the week.

Knives, machetes, bolos, swords, and the likes fall under the bladed weapons category. The great thing about bladed weapons is that you never need to reload...but you do need to keep your weapons well maintained.

Ease of Handling. Bladed weapons are much easier to handle than blunt weapons though a lot of care must be taken when handling them because one can easily hurt others (not to mention yourself) if you’re not careful.

Availability. You can find kitchen knives and butcher knives at most department stores which means they’re widely available (there’s practically a mall every few blocks in the Philippines). The bowie knives and machetes you’re going to find at a sporting goods or outdoor equipment store (not as widely available). The katanas and other exotic swords are even rarer and are usually not sharpened so there’s the added burden of trying to getting the blade battle ready...something you may not have time for.

Maintenance. While sturdier, bladed weapons do go through the usual wear and tear any tool goes through when used intensively on a daily basis. It’s only a matter of time before it succumbs if not taken cared of properly. You’ll need a whetting stone to keep it nice and sharp.

Damage. These things were specifically designed for cutting and stabbing meaning that the damage you can dish out significantly goes higher as compared to when you’re wielding blunt weapons.

Just make sure that you can actually wield the blade you’re getting. All too often people will get the biggest and meanest sword they can find only to find out later that they can’t use it.


GUNS

These are your hand guns, semi-automatics, and automatics...the things that go bang!

Ease of Handling. As anyone will tell you, it’s easy to shoot a gun. That being said, it’s easy to get shot by one too even if you’re the one holding the gun. While proper gun training might not be available during the Zombie Apocalypse always remember to follow this rule: never point the gun at anything you don’t intend to kill.

Availability. Guns and ammo shops are not as common as one would think but there are a few establishments here and there.

Maintenance. Guns need to be maintained diligently or else they’re liable to jam or worse over the course of time at the most inopportune moments. Needless to say, special training is needed to maintain and clean a gun to make sure it remains in proper working order.

Damage. One bullet to a zombie’s head and it’s out of commission. What’s great about guns is that they’re long range weapons which means one can maintain some distance (depending on the type of gun you’re using) between you and your target. Dealing with zombies at close range is not a happy prospect even for those who have extensive hand-to-hand combat knowledge and experience.

Just like with swords, the tendency is to go for the biggest guns (more like cannons in some cases) they can find. Make sure you’re comfortable with the gun you’re getting and, most importantly, don’t forget the ammo.


EXPLOSIVES AND INCENDIARY DEVICES

Grenades, dynamites, grenade launchers, bazookas, rocket launchers Molotov cocktails.

Ease of Handling. Grenades and dynamites are easy enough to use. Pull the pin in the case of the grenade and light the fuse in the case of the dynamite. Bazookas and rocket launchers are basically point and shoot. Molotov cocktails need more care because of their volatile nature.

Availability. The only place you’re going to be able to get stuff like this is from an army depot and they’re going to be hard places to get into. If you got specialized knowledge you can actually concoct a Molotov cocktail right in your kitchen with ingredients and materials that are widely available in most grocery stores and liquor shops.

Maintenance. Keep them somewhere safe. Handling guns are one thing. Handling explosive are another. Enough said.

Damage. Let’s look at the pros: imagine taking out a dozen of these undead bastards in one go. Now let’s look at the cons: imagine taking out a dozen of your own comrades...by accident.

My suggestion is that if you had no prior training to handle explosives, I suggest staying away from them as much as possible. You’re more liable to blow yourself up and fellow survivors.


CONCLUSION

So which weapon is the best? The one on hand, of course!

When you’re dealing with zombies in a post apocalyptic world, it’s best to remember the old adage: beggars can’t be choosers. You use what’s available and remember the pros and cons of each one. Keep it in mind and you just might make it out alive.

One thing that’s been bugging me though is what category does chainsaws and flame throwers fall under?

Jayvee Fernandez is our next candidate for ZOMBIFICATION

And we have our first victim...I mean candidate for zombification.

Everyone, let’s welcome Jayvee Fernandez.

Jayvee has bravely submitted his picture and will be allowing us to manipulate his digital likeness and turn him into one of the undead.

Jayvee Fernandez currently serves as chief editor for Splashpress Media and community manager for the global 9rules network. He lives on the Internet, and has thus invested in more tubes.

We’ll be getting to work on working on his picture as soon as we get through the long weekend.

Watch out for that.

If you also want to be zombified e-mail us your picture at admin (AT) jonasdiego.com!